Written by Jibblescribbits | 19 Apr 2010

HO

LY

HELL.

Adding insult to injury: Evgeny Nabokov returned home from the game last night to find Dan Boyle's car parked in his garage.

Can you win the Conn Smythe in the third game of the post season? Probably not, but if you can, Andy made the case.

The Avalanche are wanted for grand larceny in the state of California. Don't worry, even if they are arrested Anderson will bail them out.

That was the most incredible live sporting event I have ever witnessed in my entire life, certainly the most spectacular individual effort. The Sharks and their fanbase have to be wondering if that net is regulation size or what. Anderson has to be a wanted man in Silicon Valley for grand larceny, because that was just an incredible individual performance.I am going to have a sore throat from all the cheering, and most of i was just "AN-DY! AN-DY!" he deserved every bit of euphoric awkwardness as the crowed serenaded him with his own name. (And his teammates should have come out and joined in, as they were watching just as much as the crowd was.)

I have no virus blockers on my computer, just a background picture of Andy.

And honestly, this has to be the most bizarrely rewarding ending to a Denver teams playoff game since Ernest Byner dropped the ball in '89 for the Cleveland Browns. Normally I'm pretty sympathetic to guys who have unlucky plays at the wrong time, like Steve Smith, or Steve Bartman, or Scott Norwood. But I am having a tough time having any sympathy for Dan Boyle. The guy took a dirty slew foot on Alex Semin in the Olympics, and had another one on Galiardi in game 2 (that i cannot find on the internet). Karma folks. My nephew asked his mom directly after the goal "Is that guy going to get fired now?" That's just spectacular.

Dan Boyle's great great grandfather, William P Boyle was a gunfighter in Elk Town, CA. He was killed in a gun duel. The death was ruled a suicide.

More after the jump

Another note: It was finally nice to see a game ref'd the way it should be. Even the stuff the crowd got upset with, like the boarding call on Kyle Quincey, were good calls. The refs came out early and tried to make sure the chippyness from last game (largely a result of atrocious officiating) wasn't repeated by calling it tight. They let more stuff go later in the game, but never let anything get out of control. All-around good stuff by them. It's always tough to tell live, because you don't get the replays and miss stuff, but I thought the refereeing was much better tonight.

After letting the euphoria of the game wear off, Avs fans need to be honest with themselves. We got fucking lucky tonight. After the first period, the Avs were just absolutely dominated. It's hard to be hard on the boys after the win, but there were some really awful plays, and the Avs aren't going to win many games being outshot by 30+. The Avs were just abhorrent getting the puck out of their own end tonight. Two plays in particular stood out, but there were a lot. These two just personified the entire night for the Avs:

Dan Boyle is the worst drinking buddy ever. He'll buy you a shot but put it down his own piehole.

Ryan O'Reilly had the puck on his forehand after a shift the Avs had been stuck in their own zone for a few moments. Instead of chipping it past center ice, he backhanded a pass to a teammate. The pass was a little off and SJ was able to keep it in the zone, for another 5 shots. The Avs had way too many weak clears tonight, which is a gigantic problem (and one they've had all season.)

The Iceland Volcano that halted Eurpoean flights in their tracks yesterday is named Mt. Anderson. 

Scott Hannan had the worst breakout (if you can call it that) in the history of hockey tonight. He was given ample time to set up behind the net. He had three chances for outlet passes, or at least chipping it to center ice. Instead he tried to carry the puck, it flubbed off of his stick and SJ stayed in the zone for ~20 shots and 2 hours.

Dan Boyle is the world's worst tennis player. His backahands always end up in the net.

The Avs took way too many stupid rookie-like penalties, in addition to the rookie-esque plays mentioned above. Kyle Quinceys boarding towards the end of the third period was a dumb dumb penalty. You don't hit a guy in the numbers along the boards. TJ Galiardi, who has been the Avs best skater, made the dumb decision to hit Setoguchi after the whistle on an icing. I realize the icing probably shouldn't have been called, and Setoguchi certainly sold that one, but Galiardi needs to be more aware there. I hate ripping the kid after the series he's put together so far, but that was a dumb play that could have cost his team.

Avalanche players never have to wear sunscreen. Craig Anderson blocks all the UV rays for them.

Winning glosses over a lot of the bad, but I think it would be a giant mistake for the Avs to let it cloud this one. The scoreboard said the shots were 14-10 in favor of the Sharks at one point last night. They finished at 51-17 (and one of those 17 was by Mr. Boyle). For all effective purposes the Avs were outshot 37-6 over the final 36 minutes of that game. That's atrocious. The Avs really played an awful game, other than Anderson. If the Avs are outshot 3-1 in the subsequent games, the Sharks will win this series in 6.

Confederate General Stonewall Jackson was killed when he mistakenly shot by a fellow confederate soldier. That soldiers was Jedidiah Boyle, Dan's ancestor.

The good news is that Andy performed a miracle. (Good news: 2 more and he'll be canonized as a Saint.). The Avs played poorly in two games, and came out of them 1-1. They showed in game one that they have the ability to play with the Sharks.

On the 7th day God rest, Andy took over from there.

There was a legendary St. Bernard in the Swiss Alps who lead the rescue team to victims of Avalanches by barking. One such bark caused a second avalanche which buried the rescue team. The dog's name was Boyle.

(I fully encourage putting your best Boyle or Anderson jokes in the comments below. I'll add the one's I like to the post)